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PARENTS :FRIENDS or FOE??

Being an African. Our parents pretty much decide what we will and won’t be in life from when we are born. They choose our friends, fashion (what to wear), schools we attend, our hobbies to our discipline in college. Some parents even dictate who you end up marrying. They put us under so much pressures and expectations.. It’s a wonder we can grow up to make any sound decisions ourselves..they make all your decisions by telling you to be quiet. What do you know? Then all of a sudden you are grown and they want u to make decisions. How? I could barely get a word out growing up.

Now don’t get me wrong. They mostly mean well for us. But how long does meaning well continue to be at our own detriment and mental strengths? They use their power over us as our guardians and sole providers to manipulate us and tell us what to do. A typical African home, your father especially is telling you when you grow up,you will be a doctor ,or a lawyer or an accountant. Ignoring where your key talents lie.


Now you are reading a course you are not passionate/ care less about.. You manage to finish it..and end up at a job you do not like or care for. You live like a robot where u wake up and function like a zombie everyday to work to and fro.. You live a miserable life and end up resenting them..and they are not done with you.These same parents/guardians brainwash us that one religion is what God wants and not the other. Hence they instruct you to find someone of the same religion or risk losing their blessing. You must absolutely plan who you fall for and date🙄 ..After all they cannot afford to let you ruin your life by marrying another human being who you care for but they don’t care for.🙃 When truly the least of your worries in marriage is religion.

I mean...real life issues and challenges will show up and either one of you’s religion will matter or be of any use. So what are we saying? When will we ever be smart enough or grown enough for them? Its amazing how we try to please them and cater to their needs our whole life. If you are a good child of God. You want to do what the holy books say : which is to take good care of your parents like they did for you as a kid. So you send money home monthly or weekly out of d meagre amount you earn. Keeping in mind that if you had done what you really wanted to do as a career you would probably be a millionaire or richer by now. Which is very possible because to make money,you have to first be passionate about what you do.. Then comes the fame, then the money...but that is impossible now. You donť even care about the job/career ,hence have no interest in improving or being better . You are so burned out. You feel choked. It's a terrible terrible feeling to find out that you may end up at that job all your life.
Hmmm. If you are one of the few strong and passionate ones. You can start all over again..Cos truly no one knows what u want and deserve in life better than YOU. Afterall, this is your LIFE and not THEIRS and only this lifetime is promised to us. We are not sure of another. I want you to know that you can still pursue that DREAM. Set REALISTIC goals and make plans to ACTUALIZE it. It is never too late and parents will eventually grow old and die one day leaving you with the permanent decisions they made you take and you alone will have to live with the consequences. So chase that dream NOW of being a fashion stylist, Musician or Artist….e.t.c . Whatever it is.  All those jobs they told you were not society worthy. DO IT NOW cos time truly does fly and the only things we regret most when we are old are the WHAT IF’s and things we never did or the chances we never took.

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